Listen to Your Depression

Too often I have made a major mistake in my life: I’ve tried really hard to not feel something, or think “I just wish I could turn my brain off” when this mentality won’t help me at all. So, for example, if you’re feeling depressed then you’ve probably had the thought “I just want to stop feeling this way; it’s stupid that I feel this way” or something similar.

But, here’s what I’m here to say, there is tremendous wisdom in your feelings, and your brain and body are trying to tell you something. If you feel depressed, then your brain and body are trying to tell you that something is off, and something in your life needs to change.

Maybe you haven’t spent quality time with any of your friends lately, so you’re actually lonely but you just don’t realize it. Maybe you haven’t moved your body recently, so your body is begging you to get up and get active and let your muscles release some of that pent-up energy. Maybe you’ve experienced disappointment in some key areas of your life, and you need to process that disappointment.

Whatever the reason is, you probably feel depressed because something needs to change in your life, whether that’s an external change or an internal change.

If it’s an external change that you need, ask the question “What parts of my life aren’t going well right now? How can I work towards making those parts of life better?” So, maybe you aren’t very financially secure, and you need to work on sticking to your budget or increasing your income. Perhaps you don’t have very many friends, and you’ll need to find ways to get yourself around people more to allow those relationships to develop. The same could apply to your marriage, and perhaps marriage counseling could improve your outlook.

My point is this: Improving your life surely can help improve your depression, there’s no denying that.

But, it could be that you need internal change even more, as in changing the way you think and interact with your feelings. If your life is fairly good overall, yet you feel depressed, maybe you focus entirely on the negative and struggle to acknowledge the good parts of life. Perhaps you dwell on the “What-ifs” of life which takes away from being able to be present in the present. 

The reality is, you probably need some of both. Also, when you work on yourself so you can process your thoughts and feelings better, you will be in the best position to pursue your goals and dreams. That internal change is most of what we focus on in therapy, and when you change the way you process your life, you’ll build a life you actually want.

In sum: Don’t view your depression as the enemy, it’s more like a messenger. Your depressed mood is a messenger relaying the simple message “Something in life needs to change, here’s your reminder.” So, don’t ignore that message, let it be your motivation to do something about it today.

 

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